I had a rough week last week. I'm not sure if the chemicals in my body were off, if it was the seemingly minor stressful situation at work that had me on edge, or if the stars were aligned just enough to make me way crazier than usual (I can say that ;) ). I felt out of sorts and exhausted and crabby and sad and like if I could just climb in bed and pull the blankets over my head and stay there forever I'd be content. If you were my husband, you'd want to fix it and not know how. If you were my kid you'd probably wonder why Mom would rather play games from her hibernation hole than downstairs like a normal person. If you were part of my Bunco group, you'd notice that I didn't show up, backing out at the last minute.
By Thursday I was exhausted from feeling so anxious and I fell asleep around 6pm thinking I'd just doze for a few minutes while Matt took the kids to do their things. I didn't wake up again for 17 hours (Friday is my day off to "get things done"). I didn't just doze in and out and wake and go back to sleep, I was unconscious. My brain and body were exhausted. The remainder of the weekend was slightly better and I kept things light and related to soccer, things I could handle.
I have a therapist and joke that I'm crazy but really I have social anxiety and lots of other people have it too. It's painful and shameful and uncomfortable. There isn't an easy answer or an easy fix. If you're my friend or family member, just go with the flow. I might be perfectly comfortable with something one time and not willing to deal with it another. You never can tell. If I'm there, I'm probably fine. If I'm not, it just isn't going to happen and we'll all move on.
I can't pick just one:
|Mine actually does say this!|
(p.s. How does Blogger not recognize texting as a verb yet?)